Today...September 13, 2014

The sibling situation in families can create some very interesting dynamics. For instance there's the First-born Child, and for a while he or she might also be considered the Only Child; however, if another bundle of joy comes along then the toddler still maintains his status as First-born, but is no longer the Only Child which may or may not upset the apple cart.  IF the apple cart holds steady then there is an interesting phenomenon that can occur between that first and second child; I like to call it the "First Friends" Phenomenon.

For me, my older brother Shep--(short for H. Shepard Bailey, who also had a birthday on Thursday)--was always there. He's part of my very earliest memories. The style for little boys back in 1962-63 was a head that was totally buzzed, and Shep was no exception. I can remember that almost bald head very clearly, with these VERY BIG blue eyes. Through the years I've learned--and sometimes the hard way--that those blue eyes could manifest all KINDS of emotions; some good and some not so good--especially if you were the "Little Sister" who was NOT the "The Little Angel" all the time.

For Shep and me, we were definitely part of the First Friends Phenomenon but with kind of a different twist; when he was six and I was five our parents divorced. There were days when it felt like he was Hansel and I was Gretel wandering through the big, dark forest alone without ANY breadcrumbs whatsoever. Going through a divorce as siblings while we were children was definitely uncharted territory. We were frightened, heartbroken, and sometimes felt very much alone. BUT...as time passed and we adjusted to those unwanted changes, not only did we get stronger as little individuals, but our First Friends bond became forged in "fire and blood"--so to speak.

I can't actually say if Shep and I had been born into different families and we were just in the same class at school, if we would have really taken the time to get to know each other--or if we would have even wanted to. But that's NOT what happened. We WERE born into the same family, and we ARE brother and sister, and we DO know each other--like the back of our hands. We don't go around talking about it, or even mentioning it for that matter; but Shep and I can sometimes look at each other in a certain way, and in that look I know we're both remembering our togetherness as Hansel and Gretel, the Dark Forest, and the Wicked Witch that would occasionally pop out from behind a tree.  Yes, in that glance we BOTH know that in a heart-beat we would walk through fire for each other.  Happiest of Birthdays my First Friend!